“Kill them with kindness”. I’ve been pondering over this phrase for quite some time. I kind of disagree. I’m not looking to “kill” anyone with kindness. Why can’t we model acts of kindness? Kindness doesn’t require causing anyone pain. I believe its more like a cure. The cure for a heart that has been broken. There is no such thing as being allergic to kindness, either. But you should know Kindness is very contagious.
One day a coworker came into the classroom while I was in the bathroom. I heard someone call my name, I told them I’d be out in a few. As I opened the door, someone was walking from the direction of the closet. She retrieved something left by my assistant. She began to walk in my direction (as I was closer to the exit), smiled and explained the reason of the visit. We exchange pleasantries and I wished her a good day (her classroom is downstair, we rarely get to see each other). But it occurred to me, in that instance, how much our relationship changed (the fact I can call it a relationship, really means something). A complete 360.
What I mean is simply this. Two years ago, looked very different. She was not a pleasant women, when we first met. In fact, I’d thought I’d done something to offend her. My assistant described her, “She always has an attitude with everyone. Sometimes I have to tell her to calm down. She can be a little extra, with a nasty attitude.” We all know someone at work or in our personal life who acts in the same fashion. No matter how she behaved, I always would greet her every morning, even when she didn’t respond back. I never took it to heart.
I’ve witness on several occasions, her unsavory attitude. I’d fallen into the trap of gossip surrounding her. I’d quickly realized (God pointed out how wrong I was to contribute) the harm I was doing against her. How would I feel if people were talking about me negatively behind my back? It would be very hurtful. Yet, I wasn’t too far from carrying the same “nasty” attitude. I have had my share of bad days, dumping my anger and frustration on other people. We all fall short of grace and mercy.
Anyone who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty. (Job 6:14)
Fast forward to now. Our relationship has changed a lot. Maybe we have both changed. She greets me before I get the chance to do it. And it just hit me, Grace Wins through acts of kindness. Wow! Of course, it was not by my will our situation changed, but by God. God used me as an instrument to show His kindness. I do believe when God showers you with love, teaches you how to love, He will show you how to pour it over others. Apparently, she sees the Comforter in me, at one point she asked for my advise. I was thrown off focus when she asked, I think I stumbled to reply. I am glad to see her in a different light and she feels comfortable to smile at me. LOL! We’re making progress, people!
But I was not far from where she is. I, too have had dark clouds follow me. I couldn’t shake it, because I was only looking through the lens of pain. I didn’t trust the light, Jesus. Jesus didn’t stop pursuing me. Jesus planted His seeds all around me. Brought people in my life to model acts of kindness, the beauty of Gods love.
When I fell into grace and God saved me (where I became more spiritually conscious of Jesus presence), I learned of God through salvation. I learned to identify with kindness. I’d learned to identify hurting people hurt others. I have learned more about the circumstances surrounding my coworker. She is hurting internally, but she doesn’t know how to find healing. Instead of focusing on her negative attitude, I look passed it and pray, ‘God, please help her. Rescue her from whatever is keeping her in despair.” Many are the afflictions one goes through internally, that we cannot see. All I can do is pray for her and continue to show kindness, even throw in a hug. I want to see the best part of her, when others cannot see it.
We’ve all started on this exact path, before we surrendered to God. Did He not see past your bad attitude and loved You anyway. How much does it take to start showing a little more kindness? Nothing, it is a gift we can afford to give. A gift many will cherish, because you made them feel like somebody when everyone else made them feel like nobody. You can shine a spotlight on their best attributes when they cannot see it. People are still walking around blindfolded from their own identity.
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